EAST GARDEN, August 1984
Part 4 (Click to read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)
This interview with Hyo-jin nim took place when he was in his early twenties. It was first published in Today’s World magazine, and has been edited slightly for length for inclusion in this series of testimonies by early members. Hyo-jin nim’s testimony is both a refreshing personal perspective and informative on the subjects he addresses.
For me really, to see Father is not to evaluate him as a “resource” that lives in this physical world right now. I never try to compare my father’s thought to the kind of concepts I grew up with in the world–concepts that I am attached to or that I can easily relate to. I try to avoid this.
First I try to get a glance of the whole, but it has more meaning than you can comprehend readily. How can you tell a depth of a thousand feet when you are only used to a certain level? You do it step by step.
We are talking about the whole thing, the world’s future. If you can understand that in a moment, I congratulate you. I mean, even schoolwork is hard to understand. Even solutions to mathematical problems don’t come out perfect just like that. It takes a long time to find the solution. But the path of the future of the world! lf you really try to think about it, to really understand it, you have to take it step by step.
First understand yourself before you really try to understand Father’s vision. Try to realize where you stand, in this church, in your life, in your own vision, in Father’s vision. You have to ask yourself that question before you ask yourself how you are going to understand the restoration of the world. How can you give yourself a perfectly good answer if you don’t know yourself? Think about that. That’s what I believe.
For example, even within my family there are quarrels. Sometimes those are over nothing. They try to find out who is right and who is wrong. And I see that if I listen to one side it makes sense; if I listen to the other, it makes sense too. How can I decide? l spend time with my brothers and sisters. I play a very important role in this family. Many, many times my brothers and sisters are confused about what they see in reality, even in relationships between members. And because I have stepped a little ahead of them, I can tell from my experiences how to be a better person in Father’s eyes.
I can help them by understanding Father, and by understanding where I stand with my brothers and sisters, guiding them to the pathway Father wants them to take. That’s what he wants me to do at this time. Because even though I am worried about the world situation, I can do nothing about it now. What can I do? Right now, this is what I am doing.
It’s the same principle for you. Let’s say you’re on a fundraising team that goes around with ten people. Find yourself first: okay, l have this kind of character to show to God, this kind of character to be proud of. At that moment you stop. That’s your mission. Show that character to other people. That’s give and take. And other people too, if you find some good in them, or if they find some good in themselves, stop at that moment. Take whatever level other people give you, stop expecting more, and try to assure other people. Not in an arrogant way, but in a humble way.
What is humility? Always bowing, always agreeing on things? Being humble, I believe, is to be true for God. Not for one’s own benefit; for God’s benefit, for another’s benefit. I am trying to do something according to the way God looks at it, the ways of God’s heart. That is humility.
Let’s say the leader drives the van too fast and scares the sisters. And I say to him: “Sir, I know it is very frustrating to drive all day, and you’ re trying to get rid of that frustration by driving as if on a freeway …. We don’t mind if you do that on a straight road, but please, try to avoid that on a mountain road.” In a way I’m saying I understand where you stand, but please try to understand us in this kind of way. That’s give and take, too. You understand him, but you are also explaining your feelings freely. Everybody is going to benefit. Then everybody is safe and they don’t have to endure the kind of fright they had from going at that speed. This is just an example I am giving you. I am sure a lot of things like that happen in fundraising, witnessing, and in many other situations. You have to really be keen. You have to really study. Father is not just sending you out there to waste your time.
Let’s say you see a really mean-looking guy standing in the corner. You go up to him and say: “Hey, man, you look like hell. Why don’t you change? You are good. You are God’s child. You’ve got to change right away.” You say it for his benefit, but do you think he will gain from that? He wants to kill you. You can feel it inside.
But instead try going up to him, dressed like him, and say, “Hey, man, how are you doing?” and become friends with him. Not to agree with what he believes, just to achieve your means—to change his view, help him. I changed myself first; I gave first—that’s giving at that moment. Giving is not just a material thing or just giving your words or giving your heart. Sometimes by even doing something that you don’t believe in, you change for the better. Make a blueprint in your mind, a strategy. First, I have to win his heart. How can I do that? By being receptive to him. I’d wear my dungarees and cut-off sleeves. I would go to him and hang around with him for a while; then I’d say to him, “Hey, man, can I be friends with you? You know I am okay. You know where I’m coming from. Listen to me, hear me out. I feel there is more to it; I feel there is more to a man than showing your masculinity. What do you think, man? Let’s try to share something more positive. You have been living like this all your life. Don’t you think that now is the time to change for the better?”
Why don’t we do that? That’s what Father means by give and take. You can always progress.
You cannot have hard feelings; you cannot have hate if you are willing to sacrifice yourself to come to the other person’s level. Always embrace. That way you can always win. I had those kind of friends. One kid was the worst kind of person you can think of: a drug-oriented, sex-crazed maniac. But I fought with him side by side. I fought for him. He changed. To my words, he’ll listen. Because I am his life savior; in a physical way I saved him.
There may be some people in the world who don’t know the meaning of a life savior. Maybe some people out there do. I am sure there are some people who really are bad, but I am talking about people who have the potential to be on God’s side but right at this moment are lost in the dump. I am sure that maybe less than one percent of humanity is completely dark. The cruel people who hate and kill people, even children—even those people we have to change. We have to try and do it if we can.
Continued next week.